why can't i ever think of an exciting title to put on my blog?!!!! grrrrr!
Anyway!! Im feeling a bit bored with life at the moment, i know my b'day party will be great but thats in April. I need something to look forward to soon. Kinjals told me about the aquasplash thing in a couple of weeks! But that does mean i have to put on my tankini! Which i WILL feel very self concious in. I will deff look like the fat friend, in fact i will be the only person there who will look awful! I mean i know kinjal will moan about her, but i dont think she will look as bad as me! Aghhhhhhhhhh!!!! Oh well! I can be the fat fat friend for a day! Lets hope i loose some weight before then! (fat chance!) Oh well i can worry about for a few weeks and dream about being thin and getting lots of attention! But sadly i can't loose 2 stone in 2/3 weeks!!!! I can't loose that in 2 years let alone that!!!!
Well im not 100% sure what to talk about now! So any advice or subject topics would be well aprciated!
From Bikbi! xxxx
Wednesday, 31 January 2007
Tuesday, 30 January 2007
Things
Sorry not a very imaginative title to my blog!
Aghh ive booked my driving test! Lol! Im really scared! I really hope i pass. I was so sure that Mary would pass and when she didn't, it dawned on me that i have no chance! There are so many errors to my driving and there were hardly any to marys driving ( so she told me!) so really i have no chance! Oh great nevermind!
Wow im really enjoying the wwe wrestling at the moment! I want to tell the world what happened over the past few days! Unfortunatly no gives a damn! So i guess i will tell myself what happened! Lol! Actually maybe i could pin my day down for a few minutes and force feed him the information i have! That could work!
Ive been having dreams recently about the famous people i fancy! Very weird! One night it was John Cena and he was being sent to Iraq! Random! And last night it was Kane and Jason Statham! The weird thing was, Kane was apparently from New Zealand (which hes not!) and he had a london accent! HOW DOES THAT WORK!!?!!! Also in my dream last night was Jason Statham!!! Wow my dreams are good to me! And then damn it i wake up!!
As for my person emtion, fuck knows whats going on. I can't work out if im happy or sad or what! Its very weird! Oh well!!!!
Speak soon,
Bikbi
Aghh ive booked my driving test! Lol! Im really scared! I really hope i pass. I was so sure that Mary would pass and when she didn't, it dawned on me that i have no chance! There are so many errors to my driving and there were hardly any to marys driving ( so she told me!) so really i have no chance! Oh great nevermind!
Wow im really enjoying the wwe wrestling at the moment! I want to tell the world what happened over the past few days! Unfortunatly no gives a damn! So i guess i will tell myself what happened! Lol! Actually maybe i could pin my day down for a few minutes and force feed him the information i have! That could work!
Ive been having dreams recently about the famous people i fancy! Very weird! One night it was John Cena and he was being sent to Iraq! Random! And last night it was Kane and Jason Statham! The weird thing was, Kane was apparently from New Zealand (which hes not!) and he had a london accent! HOW DOES THAT WORK!!?!!! Also in my dream last night was Jason Statham!!! Wow my dreams are good to me! And then damn it i wake up!!
As for my person emtion, fuck knows whats going on. I can't work out if im happy or sad or what! Its very weird! Oh well!!!!
Speak soon,
Bikbi
Thursday, 18 January 2007
Ummmmmmmm
I havn't written a blog in a while because there has not been anything significant going on!
Ok first lets get my moans out of the way!
1) My mother keeps on commenting about my weight, and how much food i eat. If she actualy paid closer attention to me rather than my sister, she would realise that i eat the same amout she does, and my dad does and my sister does. In fact my sister eats more than i do, so why is it that my mother decides to bug me about my weight. I look at myself in the mirror the other day. I have a good body i thought to myself, these thoughts were almost shattered as soon as walked down stairs in to the kitchen. She said "i hope ur not getting any food" I felt like i was going kill her, the plan 1 orange + 1 throat= dead mother. But i just gritted my teeth and got myself a drink and calmly sat down in the living room to prove my mother wrong. Every time i talk about unhealthy food she acts as if its the devil. All i asked for the other day was whether i could have cheese cake on sunday. She snapped at me straight away, saying i was going to get fat. I can't wait for uni now, if u get in of course!
2) Aghhh exams!!! Lol! well i only have 2 left, but to behonest im scared about them. Its media and english i have left now, the hard ones! As if that wasn't bad enough, i have my convntry interview on the saturday before my final exam. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Anyway back to nice thoughts! lol! It was funny to hear that me and kt are meant to be getting married! That kept us amused for about 2 hours!!!! Aghhhh their trying to recruit us to go to Rocky Horror again! I have no money! If i was rich and didn't have an any exams of course i would go along!
You know what, i still dont have my man utd goaly socks! Grrrr! Their green aswell! GREEN! Totaly against the bananna conspiracy!
Well im not quite sure what to talk about now, i may update later...............................................
if i can be arsed!!!!
From
bikbi and happy tree :-) xxxxx
Ok first lets get my moans out of the way!
1) My mother keeps on commenting about my weight, and how much food i eat. If she actualy paid closer attention to me rather than my sister, she would realise that i eat the same amout she does, and my dad does and my sister does. In fact my sister eats more than i do, so why is it that my mother decides to bug me about my weight. I look at myself in the mirror the other day. I have a good body i thought to myself, these thoughts were almost shattered as soon as walked down stairs in to the kitchen. She said "i hope ur not getting any food" I felt like i was going kill her, the plan 1 orange + 1 throat= dead mother. But i just gritted my teeth and got myself a drink and calmly sat down in the living room to prove my mother wrong. Every time i talk about unhealthy food she acts as if its the devil. All i asked for the other day was whether i could have cheese cake on sunday. She snapped at me straight away, saying i was going to get fat. I can't wait for uni now, if u get in of course!
2) Aghhh exams!!! Lol! well i only have 2 left, but to behonest im scared about them. Its media and english i have left now, the hard ones! As if that wasn't bad enough, i have my convntry interview on the saturday before my final exam. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!
Anyway back to nice thoughts! lol! It was funny to hear that me and kt are meant to be getting married! That kept us amused for about 2 hours!!!! Aghhhh their trying to recruit us to go to Rocky Horror again! I have no money! If i was rich and didn't have an any exams of course i would go along!
You know what, i still dont have my man utd goaly socks! Grrrr! Their green aswell! GREEN! Totaly against the bananna conspiracy!
Well im not quite sure what to talk about now, i may update later...............................................
if i can be arsed!!!!
From
bikbi and happy tree :-) xxxxx
Wednesday, 10 January 2007
Wednesday 10th January 2007
Heya,
Lol i couldn't think of a title for the blog so i decided to do the date! Sorry its not imaginative! Well im still on a happy streek regardless of the fact that i was ill this morning and am still suffering! Though something that is worrying me are my exams coming up, i really need to do well in these, im starting to have doubts about my career now, i really can't see what i will end up doing as a career. I dont want to be an english teacher or any sort of teacher, that includes choi kwang do btw! If i did end up teaching that, personally i would feel like a failure! Oh we'll have to see what happens wont we! Oh fuck it talking about it still doesn't make me feel any better, im scared! Aghhhhhhhhhhhh! Lol! Though happy about everything else!
Ive been really happy with me and my body recently! Ive only lost a little bit of weight but it has really made a difference to how i feel, i dont think anyone has noticed but i have noticed a change in myself. I am more motivated to make myself look good and trying to make an effort to be more social at college aswell. I mean i dont want to turn into a popular girl, god i would hate that, i would just like to be noticed a bit more, this isn't a major thing for me though! Im quite happy how i am accepted at college at the moment anyway, so everything else is just a bonus now. Maybe thats why its making me so happy. I really need to go to another fft, i really enjoy them and like seeing everybody! Whether they feel the same way is another question, but who gives a fuck, as long as me and my closest friends enjoy ourselves thats all that matters, the rest of the guys can fuck em selves if they dont like me! Cuz to be honest its only Karl and Will that seem to bother with me. But i know Mary has to make an effort with the guys, and i WILL do the same but what Mary has that i dont is an amazing ability to flirt and have interesting conversations. I CAN have interesting conversations but it is a struggle with a guy that i dont know well. For example i can talk with Karl about sport, and with Will about martial arts and with Jason about random stuff (although sometimes it is a struggle! depends on our moods!), but other people like the Michaels and Josh and Robert i have never had a proper conversation with them, they dont seem to bother, but next time i shall make an effort to talk to them all and see what happens. I mean i wont flirt cuz i can't do that very well plus i still live in the shadow of Mary so they would think im trying to be her, but what i WILL DO is be friendly and well....... nice i suppose! Im nice all the time but im sure i can make improvments.
Reading this back i sound like i really want to fit in, i guess where the fft group is concerned i would like to be a bit more popular with them, i would like to get asked to go to things by the actualy organiser not jst through Mary, or maybe get asked to london by some of the guys. Cuz i do consider them all my friends but to be honest with people like Rob and the Michaels their just aquaintances, anyway!!! This blog really has no structure! I should be ashamed! Compared to kt's this is a shambles!!!!
Anyway any comments would be great apreciated!
From
Bikbi xxxx
Lol i couldn't think of a title for the blog so i decided to do the date! Sorry its not imaginative! Well im still on a happy streek regardless of the fact that i was ill this morning and am still suffering! Though something that is worrying me are my exams coming up, i really need to do well in these, im starting to have doubts about my career now, i really can't see what i will end up doing as a career. I dont want to be an english teacher or any sort of teacher, that includes choi kwang do btw! If i did end up teaching that, personally i would feel like a failure! Oh we'll have to see what happens wont we! Oh fuck it talking about it still doesn't make me feel any better, im scared! Aghhhhhhhhhhhh! Lol! Though happy about everything else!
Ive been really happy with me and my body recently! Ive only lost a little bit of weight but it has really made a difference to how i feel, i dont think anyone has noticed but i have noticed a change in myself. I am more motivated to make myself look good and trying to make an effort to be more social at college aswell. I mean i dont want to turn into a popular girl, god i would hate that, i would just like to be noticed a bit more, this isn't a major thing for me though! Im quite happy how i am accepted at college at the moment anyway, so everything else is just a bonus now. Maybe thats why its making me so happy. I really need to go to another fft, i really enjoy them and like seeing everybody! Whether they feel the same way is another question, but who gives a fuck, as long as me and my closest friends enjoy ourselves thats all that matters, the rest of the guys can fuck em selves if they dont like me! Cuz to be honest its only Karl and Will that seem to bother with me. But i know Mary has to make an effort with the guys, and i WILL do the same but what Mary has that i dont is an amazing ability to flirt and have interesting conversations. I CAN have interesting conversations but it is a struggle with a guy that i dont know well. For example i can talk with Karl about sport, and with Will about martial arts and with Jason about random stuff (although sometimes it is a struggle! depends on our moods!), but other people like the Michaels and Josh and Robert i have never had a proper conversation with them, they dont seem to bother, but next time i shall make an effort to talk to them all and see what happens. I mean i wont flirt cuz i can't do that very well plus i still live in the shadow of Mary so they would think im trying to be her, but what i WILL DO is be friendly and well....... nice i suppose! Im nice all the time but im sure i can make improvments.
Reading this back i sound like i really want to fit in, i guess where the fft group is concerned i would like to be a bit more popular with them, i would like to get asked to go to things by the actualy organiser not jst through Mary, or maybe get asked to london by some of the guys. Cuz i do consider them all my friends but to be honest with people like Rob and the Michaels their just aquaintances, anyway!!! This blog really has no structure! I should be ashamed! Compared to kt's this is a shambles!!!!
Anyway any comments would be great apreciated!
From
Bikbi xxxx
Monday, 8 January 2007
Life is good!
Well this week has been a weird one! I can't possibly tell u everything in the right order because my brain just doesn't work like that! Ok well Mary has got a date with Kevin, but wanted to make it a doulbe date, with me and david. I said yes but david said no. Now at this point u'd expect me to be upset, but actaully im bloody happy he said no now!!! I was thinking last night that i can do so much better than him, and at this particular moment im having more joy in fantasising about famous people! Its strange ive never gotten over someone this quickly! Although i think i know the trigger for it, and yes im afraid its related to football! After Mary told me on the phone my heart did sink a bit but then i saw Man Utd win and i just felt very happy. Also discussing my 18th party with my parents made me happy aswell. Im studying hard for my exams at the moment. I mean today i had a 3hr gap, i studied pretty much all the way through. So far the only think ive had to eat today is healthy eating flap jack bar, and that was at about 8.50am!! So yes i am hungry but i cant bring myself to eat, i think that me not eating for over 6hrs during the day is damn good achievment!
I have a sore left shoulder, but thats because i have WAYYYYYY to much in my bag at the moment, but sadly i need it all.
As im writing this blog i can't help but stare at the minute cut on my right hand just below my thumb! Well actualy if i tell you the truth ive been staring at it all day, it seems to make me happy! FUCK KNOWS WHY! I sound like a right weirdo!!!
Dad bought me a ticket for the wwe smackdown, raw was all sold out, but i think i might go on ebay nearer the time and look for tickets to wwe raw. Ive looked today but their only selling ring side ones, which are extremely expensive!!!! And theres no way that i would be able to afford them, even if i did save any form of money that came my way for the next four months! ok ok maybe i would if i did that, but come one that would mean my life would be miserable and i wouldn't want that!!!!
My shoulder really is playing me up! Its my bad one n all. The one i managed to half dislocate last year during Choi Kwang Do demo team practice! Ooooo im remembering the cool shiny uniforms we got for that! Very cool! (maybe not to u but to me their great!)
Im starting to make more of an effort now regarding make up and contact lenses etc etc, its given me a whole new confidence!!!
I must dash now, im meant to be working, although the guy next to me seems to be impressed by how much im writing! hahaha little does he know that im not doing work but writing a blog! Oh well who cares it makes me look smart!
From Bikbi :-)
P.S Happy Tree says hi xxxx
I have a sore left shoulder, but thats because i have WAYYYYYY to much in my bag at the moment, but sadly i need it all.
As im writing this blog i can't help but stare at the minute cut on my right hand just below my thumb! Well actualy if i tell you the truth ive been staring at it all day, it seems to make me happy! FUCK KNOWS WHY! I sound like a right weirdo!!!
Dad bought me a ticket for the wwe smackdown, raw was all sold out, but i think i might go on ebay nearer the time and look for tickets to wwe raw. Ive looked today but their only selling ring side ones, which are extremely expensive!!!! And theres no way that i would be able to afford them, even if i did save any form of money that came my way for the next four months! ok ok maybe i would if i did that, but come one that would mean my life would be miserable and i wouldn't want that!!!!
My shoulder really is playing me up! Its my bad one n all. The one i managed to half dislocate last year during Choi Kwang Do demo team practice! Ooooo im remembering the cool shiny uniforms we got for that! Very cool! (maybe not to u but to me their great!)
Im starting to make more of an effort now regarding make up and contact lenses etc etc, its given me a whole new confidence!!!
I must dash now, im meant to be working, although the guy next to me seems to be impressed by how much im writing! hahaha little does he know that im not doing work but writing a blog! Oh well who cares it makes me look smart!
From Bikbi :-)
P.S Happy Tree says hi xxxx
Thursday, 4 January 2007
Empty
Heya,
dont get me wrong i am happy, but i also feel that there is an empty space in side of me. I think it has something to do with the stress of my exams. I can't wait for them to be over, their really scaring me!! Im also a bit bummed out cuz i need to party again and im not sure when the next one will be. I think it will be Marys. Thats ages away :-( Oh well i want another fft, im in the mood for seeing friends, maybe someone could have one on friday??? Hmm i shall have to look into that one!
Im bored! Im in college and i really dont know what to do, im meant to have key skills next, but i really can't face it. I would love to go home but that means i would leave kt all by herself, and i can't really do that, its mean.
I still havn't seen David since the new years party. I jst wana see how much he actually remembers from the party, cuz at the moment i have no clue how bad his memory loss is!! I put some makeup on and put my contacts in today in the vain hope i would see him. But i havn't. This sounds so sad and desperate, im not even 100% sure i acutally like him still, i would have to see him in order to make my mind up! Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Right i was just thinking, i should really take that picture of John Cena down from my myspace!
Im off now,
Bikbi xx
dont get me wrong i am happy, but i also feel that there is an empty space in side of me. I think it has something to do with the stress of my exams. I can't wait for them to be over, their really scaring me!! Im also a bit bummed out cuz i need to party again and im not sure when the next one will be. I think it will be Marys. Thats ages away :-( Oh well i want another fft, im in the mood for seeing friends, maybe someone could have one on friday??? Hmm i shall have to look into that one!
Im bored! Im in college and i really dont know what to do, im meant to have key skills next, but i really can't face it. I would love to go home but that means i would leave kt all by herself, and i can't really do that, its mean.
I still havn't seen David since the new years party. I jst wana see how much he actually remembers from the party, cuz at the moment i have no clue how bad his memory loss is!! I put some makeup on and put my contacts in today in the vain hope i would see him. But i havn't. This sounds so sad and desperate, im not even 100% sure i acutally like him still, i would have to see him in order to make my mind up! Aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Right i was just thinking, i should really take that picture of John Cena down from my myspace!
Im off now,
Bikbi xx
Tuesday, 2 January 2007
Guys..........GEEZE!!!
Ok ok, so after having a conversation with Mary ive decided and have proof that guys are useles and stupid!!! Yes thats right, STUPID! :-) I know i should have realised this sooner but i was ignoring up until a few months ago. Mary asked why is that no guy can ever compliment u about something other than what u look like. Which is why i never get complimented, if they new me they would know that i have tons and tons of extremely good qualities. But hey its there loss, i have decided that i have better things to do than try and get guys. STUFF EM!
So therefore with that statemeant in mind, JOHN CENA TRYS TO BE BLACK!! I have supressed this for as long as i possibly can but now i just cant take it any more. After reading an interview he did with Snoog Dog, i almost collapsed on the floor in absolute laughter and probably would have wet myself if i read it again! So JOHN CENA, you are no longer overall cool in my books now. I may still like to admire ur looks but as for u as a person. TAKE A HIKE!
As you can see im in a very happy mood! I was tranquil but now its GIRL POWER all the way!
Right im off to listen to some Spice Girls songs!!!
Bikbi xxx
So therefore with that statemeant in mind, JOHN CENA TRYS TO BE BLACK!! I have supressed this for as long as i possibly can but now i just cant take it any more. After reading an interview he did with Snoog Dog, i almost collapsed on the floor in absolute laughter and probably would have wet myself if i read it again! So JOHN CENA, you are no longer overall cool in my books now. I may still like to admire ur looks but as for u as a person. TAKE A HIKE!
As you can see im in a very happy mood! I was tranquil but now its GIRL POWER all the way!
Right im off to listen to some Spice Girls songs!!!
Bikbi xxx
Monday, 1 January 2007
The day after!
Hey again,
Ok so its the day after the party and it went really really well! I had so much fun i didn't honestly want to leave! But it was getting late and we had quite a journey home. Well to my suprise there was this guy called David from my college who i had liked for while, he was there! Totally random! And he spoke to me! i know this may seem petty and stupid but he doesn't talk that much to anyone in english or media so it was nice to get to know him! At one point in the night i ended up having to help him drink a glass of water because he couldn't hold the glass himself and B he needed the water!!! So overall it was a very good night and i thoroughly enjoyed it. And what made it better was that no one cared about what people looked like, i felt so comfortable around everyone it twas great!
Mary, Kinjal and Will stayed over and didn't leave untlil late, which was nice because i enjoy their company and we all get along well and had fun! I also liked the fact that we walked down to Sainsburys, if there was any of the rest of the group there, they would have turned their nose up at walking there, so overall it twas good!
Im sure there is probably more i could write but for the moment i can't think of it!
Bikbi xxx
Ok so its the day after the party and it went really really well! I had so much fun i didn't honestly want to leave! But it was getting late and we had quite a journey home. Well to my suprise there was this guy called David from my college who i had liked for while, he was there! Totally random! And he spoke to me! i know this may seem petty and stupid but he doesn't talk that much to anyone in english or media so it was nice to get to know him! At one point in the night i ended up having to help him drink a glass of water because he couldn't hold the glass himself and B he needed the water!!! So overall it was a very good night and i thoroughly enjoyed it. And what made it better was that no one cared about what people looked like, i felt so comfortable around everyone it twas great!
Mary, Kinjal and Will stayed over and didn't leave untlil late, which was nice because i enjoy their company and we all get along well and had fun! I also liked the fact that we walked down to Sainsburys, if there was any of the rest of the group there, they would have turned their nose up at walking there, so overall it twas good!
Im sure there is probably more i could write but for the moment i can't think of it!
Bikbi xxx
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